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politics

What the Heck Was Bobby Jindal Talking About?

Matt Negrin

Posted: Feb 25th 2009 12:04AM

Filed under: Politics, Boston University, The Economy

The Louisiana governor had a tough act to follow Tuesday night. But Bobby Jindal, decidedly another rising star among the GOP's ranks, gulped down his fears and strode through the hallways of his mansion to deliver the "Republican Response" to Barack Obama's pep talk for America.

Bearing resemblance to an essay I wrote in the fourth grade, Jindal's speech was titled "Americans Can Do Anything." Obama had just spoken about making the country stronger than ever, like a majestic phoenix rising from the ashes of the nation's collapsed banking system. On the way, Obama even promised to cure cancer. How is Jindal supposed to respond to that?

He did the only thing he could do -- or at least what his speechwriters had planned out for him. He talked about Obama's historic presidency. He spent an unusually long time talking about how his own parents came to Louisiana from India, and they couldn't pay for his birth delivery, but his dad worked out a deal with a doctor, and then one time he went to the grocery store with his dad, and his dad was awed by the amount of food on the shelves, and then he said, "Bobby, Americans can do anything."

At an apparent loss for a segue into his official response to Obama, Jindal opted to tell another anecdote -- this time about when he visited a sheriff during Katrina, and the sheriff was yelling into the phone, and Jindal asked him why he was so mad, and the sheriff said that volunteers with boats who came to rescue people on their rooftops couldn't get permission to save people because "some bureaucrat" forbade them from rowing without proof of insurance and registration. Then Jindal said that was ridiculous, and the sheriff yelled into the phone again, and --

Hey, Bobby, do you have any specifics about the economy, or anything?

After what seemed like hours later, Jindal finally got to his point: Republicans rightfully wanted to lower taxes to "create more jobs." But the darn Democrats axed the plan. Instead, he said, they passed a wasteful bill that puts aside $140 million for "volcano monitoring."

Hey, Democrats! What you "should be monitoring is the eruption of spending in Washington, D.C.," Jindal awkwardly quipped.

Jindal also highlighted other vague GOP principles: to "address the crisis in health care," "make sure every child in America gets the best possible education" and "promote confidence in America."

And for all his talk about Democrats' quibbling and misguided politics, he chided them for not being "bipartisan" enough. Everyone should "put aside partisan politics and work together," he said. No word yet on whether his fellow Republicans, nearly all of whom voted against the stimulus package, got that message.

Jindal, who gained political points among some Republicans when he said last week that he will refuse some stimulus money, also may have forgotten to look over his notes after Obama's address. One of the first things Obama said was, "We will rebuild, we will recover, and the United States of America will emerge stronger than before."

Yet Jindal for some reason countered with, "Don't let anyone tell you that we cannot recover, or that America's best days are behind her."

Jindal, whose tie matched the stripes on the American flag behind him, closed his national debut by invoking the abolition of slavery, the triumph over the Great Depression, victories in not one but two world wars, equalities gained from the civil rights battle, the extinguishing of the "Soviet menace" and the courageous response to the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks.

"The American spirit has triumphed over almost every form of adversity known to man," he said, "and the American spirit will triumph again."

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